Part 2: Don't know how this reads, but you get the idea...
On a more serious note, how about the times when worry overcomes us, get overwhelmed, when we begin to compare ourselves to the perfect mom? These are some areas that they Lord has laid on my heart to share with you today.
1. WORRY-When we had Annie, I felt like we were living under a cloud of worry. For those of you that don’t know, the night we brought Annie home from the hospital, I went to lay her down for the night. She began to make this coughing/gagging noise. I got up to check on her only to find that she had gone limp and pretty much stopped breathing. Nothing marks the weakness of worry like seeing your child sick or hurting. We felt so helpless. Worry and doubt began to settle in and basically consumed the first few months of little Annie Lenae’s life. We were so blessed to have the support of our family, pastor, and friends to remind us of the Lord’s promise. My father has always reminding me of this phrase…Worry ends where faith begins! Think about that…worry fades away when you have a faith that the Lord is going to bring you through. My father wrote this on a piece of paper and it is hanging on my fridge as a constant reminder.
Isaiah 26:3, says, “I will give him perfect peace whose mind is stayed on him.”
As child and teenager, I experienced worry that resulted in ulcers. I walked around fearful and worried about everything. I didn’t know the extent of worry until I become a mother. I can honestly say that the Lord used the situation with Annie and motherhood to teach me to rely on him for strength and protection. I know that we wouldn’t have made it during that time without Him carrying us through it all! Now, every once in a while, I can hear myself begin to worry, but I have to remind myself to go to the Lord in prayer and trust that His plan is way better than mine. Philippians 4:6,7 teaches us just this. We don’t need to be anxious about anything, but pray with thanksgiving and we will receive the peace of God.
It is important for me to also take time to praise the Lord because Annie is doing wonderfully and he truly brought us through that rough time. There is not a day that goes by that I don’t stare at her in amazement…she is a miracle, indeed.
2. OVERWHELMED
You have all heard the phrase, “so much to do and so little time.” Moms often feel overwhelmed because we are on the “MOM-Me” rollercoaster. What I mean is that there is always a child that is yelling MOM…take care of ME. We often over-schedule ourselves because we can’t say NO. Some of us can’t say NO to our kids and others of us can’t say NO to others and there are those that can’t say NO to anyone! I often struggle with saying NO to others. I agree to do this and that and then find myself living from task to task. We set unrealistic goals and tasks that make it impossible to fulfill our every day duties. We have ways that we want things done and it is stressful when that doesn’t pan out! It is just flat out hard to balance everything-the noise, mess, chaos, schedules, to-dos and overwhelming sense of responsibility. This just isn’t way that God wants us to feel. I think we need to embrace the idea that we may not get everything done and that is OK!
We expect too much of ourselves and need to take a break- a time-out of sorts. A lot of times, my breaks are as simple as kissing my kids. I don’t mean a kiss and then move on. I will simply ignore all that has to be done, sit down on the floor with the kids to endless kissing and tickling. For me, smelling their little faces and hearing their giggles gives me a renewed energy. Whatever you choose to do, an occasional time-out is necessary.
3. COMPARISON TO THE PERFECT MOM…WONDER MOM
You have seen her…she is different for each of us, but she exists in our mind…the super hero, the perfect mom…Wonder MOM.
I mean really…what is the perfect mom? No matter how hard I try, I just can’t seem to reach the WONDER MOM status. As I began to evaluate this Wonder Mom phenom, I discovered that what I see as perfect is actually a collection of traits from several other moms. At times, we feel that if we don’t meet the perfect standards we set for ourselves then we are weak as mothers.
If I am good in one area then I found another area that needs work. Coupons, cooking, correction, creativity, cleaning, fashion, organization, AND the list goes on. There are a lot of wonderful moms out there that can inspire you, but they are not perfect in every area and you aren’t either. Let me repeat that…THERE IS NO PERFECT MOM. Just remember it is good to be inspired by other mothers because we need to strive to be the very best mother, but be careful because there is a very fine line between inspire and compare.
(the following was adapted from Sarah Bragg's book, Body. Boys. Beauty.)
Comparison is a dangerous trap because what happens is you are putting yourself down OR exalting yourself. Try to be the best mom to your children and stop trying to be the best mom you can be up against another mom. Galatians 1:10 challenges us to seek the favor of God not men. You are not trying to seek the favor of yourself or other moms around you, but the favor of GOD.
My friend, Sarah, from college established this rule: Go out of your way to celebrate publicly whatever threatens you privately. If you find that you are jealous or comparing yourself to another person, celebrate that trait first with God and then celebrate with that person. This doesn’t mean cut yourself down! Celebrate, so the spirit of jealousy and competition is weeded out of your heart.
All of this makes me question, why do we often feel weak or guilty? The Lord has been gently reminding me that he allows us to feel this way, so that we will turn to HIM for help. He is our strength and our hope! No matter how well we do in some areas, we are always going to fail if we are relying on our own strength.
***Hang with me...there is more...check back for some ways to overcome the feeling of weakness. ***
:)
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